As I write this post, Boulder has been covered in a blanket of white, glistening snow signaling that it is once again that time of year where there’s a party almost every day. Yes, the holidays are upon us and thus my annual battle to maintain a healthy diet has begun. Even if you have no food allergies, it is nearly impossible to eat a 100% healthy diet all the time and it is especially hard during the holiday season, which pretty much lasts from Thanksgiving through New Year’s. (Okay, for some of us Halloween actually kicks off the challenge)
There are sweets around every corner. You have office parties, cookie decorating gatherings, and the seemingly endless flow of friends and neighbors dropping by with plates of homemade holiday treats. You find yourself wishing that New Year’s Eve would get here already so you don’t have to deal with the insensitivity! Unless you become a hermit during the holidays, it really can be hard to escape the onslaught of celebratory deliciousness.
After a recent party, a friend of mine who has been diagnosed with Celiac Disease broke down in tears as we were heading back to the car. “That was miserable!”, she sniffled. “If one more person shoves a cookie at me telling me that one bite won’t hurt, I will lose it! I am so tired of people telling me that gluten-intolerance is some sort of fad and it’s a party so I should treat myself” In fact, in my friend’s case, and for anyone who suffers with a gluten intolerance, one bite can be devastating. “How do I politely tell people that it’s not ‘all in my head’ and that I really can’t have a bite?”, my friend asked.
In a perfect world, of course, my friend would not have to explain her situation every time she asks for a list of ingredients or turns down a treat. We talked for a while about some of the possible responses my friend might share with those who are being insensitive and insisting that she “just try some.”
Whether it’s a birthday celebration, a holiday gathering, dinner with friends or any other meal or snack, we decided that some gluten-free etiquette tips might be in order.
- Be clear and decisive but gentle (at least at first) when turning down a treat or other item with gluten
- If appropriate, bring your own gluten-free treat to share. If people see you eating something, they may be less likely to make comments.
- Say “thank you” and explain that you have a serious gluten allergy and have eliminated gluten from your diet. You could even point out that you brought something to share and ask for feedback on what you brought. Hopefully, this will distract the person long enough for you to slip into another room. If that doesn’t work move on to #4
- “No. I really can’t have any gluten. Even the smallest amount makes me seriously ill. If you’d like some information about gluten intolerance and Celiac Disease, I’d be happy to email you some resources.” And if that doesn’t work, try number 5,
- “It’s just like any other food allergy and I’d really appreciate the same respect that you’d have for someone with a peanut or shellfish allergy.”
- Finally, if someone really insists on pushing the subject, it’s fine to simply wish them a happy holiday (or a nice evening or whatever the occasion might be), excuse yourself , grab one of the gluten-free treats you brought and move on to another conversation with someone else.
How do you handle it when others are insensitive about your gluten sensitivity?
